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The Loop Closes

by abbrev

supported by
Jamie Crofts
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lyrics

LYRICS:

The Loop Closes

The loop closes
and the process starts again.
I'm going through a messy divorce
with my sense of self..

I've become distant,
detached,
adrift
I've become a stranger to myself.

My self recognition breaks down
my sense of cognition slows down.
I am outside,
anterior to my self.

My reflection is obscured,
guarded from me,
by tangential thoughts
and avoidant, self-imposed isolation.

My thoughts are impoverished.
emaciated and starving.
There is no me
for me to think through.

Just an unstable, oscillating
stream of consciousness.
I reflect in it's white water
and see only froth.

The pressure mounts,
the concentration wains.
and I feel only
fatigue.

Interference gli///tches me
I lose my train of...
I'm blocked.
I'm fading.

There is a silence
that echoes.
echoes
echoes
echoes
echoes
echoes

My outer speech
becomes intternal.
Unable to discriminate,
I give into compulsions.

Attention and memory
are disturbed,
as is time.
Time is as disturbed
our memory and attention

Expression tuned down.
Distortion widens.
Perceive only distance.
The world is derealised,

How old am I?
What gender am I?
How do I do this?
Who am I being?

Anxiety leads to
panic leads to
phobia leads to
paranoia leads to
Anxiety leads to
panic leads to
phobia leads to
paranoia leads to
Anxiety leads to
panic leads to
phobia leads to
paranoia leads to
Anxiety leads to
panic leads to
phobia leads to
paranoia leads to
Anxiety leads to
panic leads to
phobia leads to
paranoia leads to
Anxiety leads to
panic leads to
phobia leads to
paranoia

This is not my body.
That is not me.
That is not my reflection.
These are not my hands.

I fall apart, split in confusion.
I come back together wrong.
My arms move without me.
But, they won't move for me.

I am the reflection.
I am a shadow.
I am alone.
I am the only one here.

What's under my skin is dead.
I can no longer identify with that.
I cannot return to routine.
And I stay here in limbo.

It is the longest,
darkest,
coldest
night

of the soul.

I need to sew my shadow back on,
or I will float away.
I eat my own tail
and the loop closes.



The loop closes
and the process starts again.
The loop closes
and the process starts again.
The loop closes
and the process starts again.
The loop closes
and the process starts again.
The loop closes
and the process starts again.
The loop closes
and the process starts again.
The loop closes
and the process starts again.
The loop closes
and the process starts again.
The loop closes
and the process starts again.
The loop closes
and the process starts a+gain.

credits

released February 23, 2018
Lyrics & Music by: Donnelly, J.

license

all rights reserved

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about

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abbrev Lincoln, UK

Abbrev is a tall creature than can be seen huddled around small glowing screen, nodding its head to hypnotic beats and synthesised waveforms.

Abbrev writes and produces it's tracks single​-hande​dly.

Abbrev likes the basic, yet strange sounds. Abbrev's tracks all seem to start one way and end another. Abbrev likes to experiment and likes to write and record within a week. ... more

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